Sneak Peek of Ozzy's New Video...

The Local Launch 05/28-06/02

The Local Launch

Thursday 5/27

• Regicide, Anabolic Annihilation, Ivory Ocean and Small Time Hero will be thrashing Code Red Cafe. Show kicks off at 7pm. ($5)
• Raving Nail and God Tiny bring a little electronic sound to Equinox at 8pm. ($5)
• Spoken, Burning Yesterday, and Lifeblood with christian metal, 7pm at University Church of Christ.

Friday 5/28

• Psykryptyca, Years of Cold, and Visions of Earth with the metal at Code Red Cafe, 7pm. *ps- I hear Psykryptyca is recording their live album this night, so get out and make some noise!!! ($5)

Saturday 5/29

• Rhythm Mystic are rocking Brigid's Cross in Picacho Hills starting at 7pm. (free)
• Fermentia, Divided Inside, and Cruces Cult live uup to their metal reputations at Code Red, 7pm. ($5)
• Feeling alternative? JJCnV will be at Equinox, 8pm. ($5)
• And don't forget about the Southern New Mexico Wine Festival all weekend! Cath Undiscovered and Nuevo Sol rocking from Noon-6pm. ($15 wine fest tix, +21)

Sunday 5/30

• Before the Fall and In Words of the Mute bring some hard rock to Equinox, 6pm. ($5)

Monday 5/31

• The Fall of Catalina, The Requested, Fire From The Gods, Caramel Carmela, and Friday Nights have a whole night of metal planned at Equinox, 6pm. ($5)

The Local Launch is Sponsored by El Patio Cantina in the Mesilla Plaza! The Best Shows Are Always At El Patio! Only $3 covers, amazing drinks specials, and your source for rock. And celebrate responsibility daily with El Patio!!!

Thurday Night:
After the Fall and Wormhole

Friday Night:
Blaze The Nation

Saturday Night:
Milagro



And get more shows with this Thursday's edition of

Slipknot Bassist Found Dead in Iowa Hotel....

 This is the most reliable source I've been able to find so far.......See the full story HERE

According to the Des Moines Register, Urbandale, Iowa police are investigating the death of SLIPKNOT's bass guitarist at a local hotel.

Paul Dedrick Gray, 38, of Johnston was found dead at approximately 10:50 a.m. today by an employee at TownePlace Suites (pictured below), 8800 Northpark Drive, police said.

There was no evidence of foul play, police said.

According to KCCI.com, the Polk County Medical Examiner's Office is assisting in the death investigation and will perform an autopsy on Tuesday. Toxicology testing will be completed to determine if there were any contributing factors in the death of Gray, police said.

Witnesses reported that items from the hotel room were carried out of the hotel around 2 p.m.

Gray was born in Los Angeles, California, and later moved to Des Moines.

Wikipedia shows that Gray has been married for two years to GodsGirls' Brenna Paul and has a tattoo of her name on his knuckles.

In a December 2009 posting on his MySpace page, Gray revealed that his wife was pregnant with the couple's first child. "I am the happiest man on the face of the earth — literally!" he wrote. He added, "This has been the best Christmas I have ever had!"

Back in 2003, authorities agreed to drop drug possession charges against Paul Gray in exchange for Gray's acknowledgement that he was on drugs when he was involved in a minor traffic accident (Story#1, Story#2) in the summer of 2003 in Des Moines.

Des Moines police arrested Gray on June 1, 2003 after his car collided with a car at Martin Luther King Jr. Parkway and Carpenter Avenue.

A police report at the time said Gray "had impaired balance, slurred and dull speech, and extremely sleepy and dull behavior."

Remember the stupid political ad I posted earlier?

Well God bless FunnyorDie.com

We're Better Than That, Too!!!!  w/ Dale Peterson - watch more funny videos

The Most Ridiculous Political Ad I've Ever Seen...

And tune in with me from 2-7 this afternoon as we make fun of it!!!!

WTF is this Killswitch Engage?!?!?

Really. I hate waiting first off...and little green men. I'm scared....

The Local Launch

The Local Launch

Thursday 5/20:

• Scordatura Vita, Perfect on Paper, Second Class Citizens, and Despite the Unknown bring some punk/metal to Code Red starting at 7pm. ($5)
• Raving Nail and Annabel get a little indie rock at the Equinox at 8pm ($5)

Friday 5/21:

• Catch some blues/rock with CW Ayon at the Amaro Winery starting at 5pm (21+, free)
• Soulshine rock Brigid's Cross at 8pm (free)
• The Fall of Catalina, MetalArc, When All Becomes Fatal, and Friday Nights headline Code Red's Metal show starting at 7pm ($5)
• A Midsky Surrender and A Phoenix Forever rock the Equinox at 8pm ($5)
• Wormhole brings their hard rock to Hurricane Alley at 10pm (21+, $4)

Saturday 5/22:

• Savage Wizdom, Divided Inside, Blood Drunk, and Kultivation thrash Code Red, kicking things off at 7pm ($5)

The Local Launch is Sponsored by El Patio Cantina in the Mesilla Plaza! The Best Shows Are Always At El Patio! Only $3 covers, amazing drinks specials, and your source for rock. And celebrate responsibility daily with El Patio!!!

Thurday Night:

Midnight Radio

Friday Night:

Locus Control and Kryoburn 

Saturday Night:

Triple Jack

The Local Launch is Powered By

Shannon's New Shirt....

Shannon Ellis. Midday rocker. "The Man of a Thousand Tongues" as Jack puts it (makes me blush even typing that name...lol). And wearer of PLAID. Every day. Really. Now, I'm not knockin' Shannon at all. He always looks quite nice. But this morning I was joking with him about how I was one day going to buy him a polka dot shirt. He replied, "Only if has pink dots!" Then....I found this...muwahahahahaha!

Oh yes Shannon. I've put it on lay-away. Expect it soon:) Can't wait to see ya wearing it around the office:) muwahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!

Metal Betty White :-)

 Yes!!!! This was made for me, I'm just sure of it:) Big props going out to Adam Killer on myspace for posting such gloriousness:)

iPad Still Sounds Like a Maxi Pad To Me..

So I'm at home on my lunch, grubbin' some grub and watching the boob tube, as is my usual routine. When the new iPad commercial comes on. I never even looked up, but based on the first 3 lines on the script, I could have sworn I was watching a Maxi Pad commercial! See for yourself....

The Local Launch 5/14-5/19

FRIDAY

• Daniel Park @ Brigid's Cross (7 p.m., acoustic rock, free) • MetalArc, A King's Afflication, Coda @ Code Red (7 p.m., screamo/metal, $5)

SATURDAY

• A Letter of Warning, 82 Minutes, Hometown Letdown @ Code Red (7 p.m., punk, $5)• Cosmic Slop @ El Patio (9 p.m., funk, $3, 21+)• Opinions; Intentions, Second Class Citizens, Small Town Hero @ Equinox (8 p.m., alt-rock/folk, $5)• Anthony Pacheco @ Hookah Zen (9 p.m., acoustic rock, $2, 18+)• Daniel Park @ Hurricane Alley (10 p.m., rock,$4, 21+)• RoadHouse @ Q-Time (9 p.m., rock, $3, 21+)• Aux, Yazata, Amber Gris, Chris Mason @ Yum Bunny fundraiser, 991 W. Picacho Ave. (noon, rock/punk, free)

SUNDAY

• April Ticket @ Don Felix (2 p.m., acoustic rock, free)• El Paso Punk Showcase: Old and Ill, Gride, P.L.F., Laughing Dog, Ronoso @ Trainyard (8 p.m., punk, $5)

MONDAY

• Daniel Park @ De La Vega's (9 p.m., acoustic rock, free)• Tea and Music: The Physics of Meaning @ Equinox (8 p.m., indie rock, $5)

TUESDAY

• Future Islands, Lower Dens, Rovar 17, Jeff Rehnlund @ Equinox (8 p.m., New Wave/experimental, $5)• El Paso Punk Showcase: Infested, Med-X @ Santorini (8 p.m., punk, $5)

The Local Launch is Sponsored by El Patio Cantina in the Mesilla Plaza! The Best Shows Are Always At El Patio! Only $3 covers, amazing drinks specials, and your source for rock. And celebrate responsibility daily with El Patio!!!

Friday :

Night rock out with The Phuzz starting at 10!

Saturday:

don't miss Cosmic Slop dominate the stage!

New A7X Sneak Peak!!!!

Avenged Sevenfold has been in a studio for a bit working with Dream Theater's drummer, Mike Portnoy. Here's a taste of what we'll be getting;)

Nightmare (Preview)byavengedsevenfold

I think this was invented just for me....

So if you are addicted to caffiene like I am....it just seems like we can never get enough!!! I swear if i try to skip the java in the mornings, I am pretty much saying "I don't feel like functioning at all today." That's where this little bar of perfection kicks in, and I'm convinced it was inveneted just for me:)
 Shower Shock has about 200 milligrams of caffeine per shower....which is just enough of a jolt to kick start your day. You absorb the caffeine through your skin as you lather up. Effing genius I tell you!!!! You can get it at ThinkGeek.com.

Lindsay doing porn might be a good idea....

see more Lol Celebs

How much crack has she really been doing????

Betty White's Delicious Muffin...

I want to be Betty White when I grow up.... 'nuff said.

The Local Launch

Thursday 5/6:

• Divided Inside, Old and Ill, and Regicide bring some thrash to Code Red (7p, $5)
• The Moog, The Photo Atlas, Smile Radio, and Luke Nail rock Equinox (8p, $5)

Friday 5/7:

• Resurgam, Psykryptyca, Spaak, and Anabolic Annihilation @ Code Red (7p, $5)
• Equinox is hosting a St. Jude's Benefit Show with The Balcony Scene (8pm, $5)
• Daniel Park also rocks Mix (6p, free)
• All That Bleeds rock Q-Time's outside stage (10p)
• Blaze The Nation and Kit Karson Rehab bring a little reggae to Rainforest (10p, $4)

Saturday 5/8:

• The "We Ain't Gettin' Any Younger" Tour takes over Code Red with A Step Ahead, Me and The Captiain, A Strange Descent, Ivory Ocean and Feed The Need (6p, $7)
• Catch Weatherbox, Cadence, I Bet It Was A Massacre at Equinox (8p, $5)
• The Liars and Liquid Cheese rock Hurricane Alley (8p, $6, 21+)
• Blaze The Nation @ Q-Time (10p, $3, 21+)

Sunday 5/9:

• Check out Coca Cola with some ide rock @ Equinox ($5, 8pm)
• Get punk with The Anchor and Buffalo at the Trainyard (8pm, $3)

Wednesday 5/11:

• Musical Charis with be at Equinox (8p, $5)
• Sister Kisser rocks the Trainyard (8p, $3)

The Local Launch is Sponsored by El Patio Cantina in the Mesilla Plaza! The Best Shows Are Always At El Patio! Only $3 covers, amazing drinks specials, and your source for rock.

Friday night:

Rock hard with Worm-Hole, the Cantina Flys and Divided Inside! Only at El Patio! Music kicks off at 10p! See ya at El Patio!

No Means No.....

Rough sex. Hey, it works for some people. But maybe not all the time....I wanted to use this story for our Stupid Criminal of the Day....but I dunno. Just doesn't quite fit, ya know? Anyway...

Robert Cline III of Florida likes rough sex. But even the roughest can be outdone! See, Rob and his wife Anita are separated, working on a divorce. But they still get together every Monday for some casual give and take. Well, this past Monday didn't go as smoothly as it usually did. Anita told Rob he was getting too rough. And Rob made the worst mistake a man can ever make, he laughed her off and kept going. So Anita grabbed a gun and put it to his chest. Rob took this as foreplay. Anita shot Rob.

I guess you could say Rob is still stiff....in the morgue. Anita is awaiting her trial.

World's Oldest Person Dies....Again....

Only a few weeks ago I reported to you that the world's oldest person had died. Well, its happened again. Think about it....when the world's oldest person croaks, there's always another person who becomes the oldest. And apparently its not a very long standing gig for anyone!

Kama Chinen of Okinawa, Japan passed away just one week shy of her 115th birthday.

But now the title of "World's Oldest" belongs to Frenchie Eugenie Blanchard.

Haha! This whole "World's Oldest" stuff is the equivalent of poking an old fart at a funeral and saying "you're next!"

Gotta love it;)

May is Masturbation Month!!!!

Give yourself a hand!!!! May is national Masturbation Month!!!! And man, I'm all for it:) So let's talk about a little self-induced hanky-panky. In this day and age there are tons of way to do it, and get away with it! Dr. Susan block is assuring jerk-offs that there is nothing wrong with loving yourself, "Its educational, it teaches you about your body." And apparently all that self-love you've been giving yourself keeps you healthy too!!! Our dirty doc says that orgasms are a natural decongestant! So if you've got the sniffles, diddle away! And ladies, headaches can be cure by the big O as well.

Need a little motivation for your self-lovin'??

There is now a high-tech sex toy that made even me blush! The RealTouch is a sex simulation device that goes on a guys member, then it takes its orders from specially-encoded videos you can get online, and simulates that sensations you see online! Wow. I'm just tingling with anticipation over the first court case to come to light when a guy gets his wang caught in this! hahaha!

I Told You Trent Wasn't Finished Yet....

Nine Inch Nails frontman, Trent Reznor, has lost hhis mind in my opnion. there was his violent addiction to twitter last year, then his never-seeming-to-end drama about NIN being over and done with. Their last concert was held in NYC last year if you didn't know. But I knew I tell you!!!! He's too musically absobed to bak off completely. And this is my official "I told you so!" to the world!

Rumors have leaked that Trent has made his music a family affair! The rocker is teaming up with his wife and created a new band called Destroy All Angels. So far it sounds like it may have an electronic feel to it, and the duo should be releasing the debut album sometime this summer.

OzzFest is FINALLY Official!!!!

I get at least one phone call every day from a listener looking for info on this year's OzzFest. And everyday I have to tell that listener that there is nothing to know. Really. It gets quite depressing after a while. So you can imagine how elated I was when I read this at ozzfest.com:

More than 15 years after OZZY OSBOURNE debuted OZZFest, the defining blueprint for hard rock tours and festivals returns this August in six American cities with an explosive bill co-headlined by OZZY and, in their first-ever OZZFest appearance, Mötley Crüe—touring together for the first time with OZZY since he invited the group on their now legendary 1984 arena tour. Expect the energy to go way off the charts at the all-day extravaganza of music and deranged merriment.

The 2010 OZZFest--back after taking a year off in 2009 and the 2008 one-off stadium spectacular in Dallas, TX with OZZY and Metallica headlining--will kick off August 14 in San Bernardino (the birthplace of the first OZZFest in 1996) and then make stops in Chicago, IL, Hartford, CT, Camden, NJ, Pittsburgh, PA and Boston, MA. Live Nation will promote the tour nationally.

The main stage will feature full sets from Ozzy, Mötley Crüe and Rob Halford (who last appeared on OZZFest in 2004 with Judas Priest), performing songs from his solo career along with material from Judas Priest and Fight. DevilDriver and Nonpoint will round out the main stage line-up. Second stage headliners and six-time OZZFest veterans Black Label Society will be joined by Drowning Pool, Kingdom of Sorrow, and Goatwhore, Skeletonwitch, Saviours and Kataklysm.

Each OZZFest date will include 13 bands on two stages with music beginning at 1:00 PM. In addition, concert-goers can once again visit the OZZFest “Village of the Damned” featuring a mix of interactive activities, shopping and entertainment throughout the venue concourses.

These OZZFest dates mark the first concerts in the U.S. in connection with the June 15 release of SCREAM (Epic Records), the OZZFest’s founder’s first album in three years and 10th studio album overall. OZZY’s band consists of his OZZY’s new guitar player, Gus G., bassist Blasko, drummer Tommy Clufetos and keyboardist Adam Wakeman.

Tickets for the shows go on sale May 22 at www.OZZfest.com and www.LiveNation.com.

The 2010 OZZFEST dates are as follows:

Sat, Aug 14 - San Bernardino, CA - San Manuel Amphitheater

Tue, Aug 17 - Chicago, IL - First Midwest Bank Amp.

Thurs, Aug 19 - Pittsburgh, PA - First Niagara Pavilion

Sat , Aug 21 - Hartford, CT - Comcast Theater

Sun, Aug 22 - Camden, NJ - Susquehanna

Tue, Aug 24 - Boston, MA - Comcast Center